Life's a bit like that, isn't it? Always too much or not enough? I think perhaps all the moments that aren't like that are the ones we don't notice because they feel so regular or normal, almost like nothing is happening it all. It seems to me the only time we really take notice of life is when it's not normal. When we have too much or not enough.
Sometime last year (when it wasn't lemon season) I was really craving lemons and they were so overly priced at the supermarket it wasn't worth it. I like to have a glass of hot water with lemon in it each morning to start my day (good for the digestion - so they say) and I had to give it a miss. Due to my almost subconscious daily habit I had not even given a thought to the lemons when they were readily available.... until they weren't.
We are lucky enough to have a beautiful lemon tree in our backyard. It's not a huge tree but it's lovely and it produces more lemons than we know what to do with (when the time is right). At this time of year we have an abundance of lemons. We have homemade lemonade, we have lemon ice cubes (because I am preparing for a time when lemons will be not so readily available again), we have fresh lemons. I am now looking into how to pickle lemons..... the point is, we have a lot of lemons.
Life is a little like my lemons. Too much or not enough. I think it is time perhaps that I start to pay more attention to the plain, ordinary, everyday stuff in between because that is actually what life is. It's not the too much or the not enough - we only notice that stuff because it's few and far between. The good stuff is in the middle. Like watching you children softly breathing in their sleep, like appreciating the fact that your husband takes the children to swimming lessons to give you a break, like talking to your mum or your friend on the phone about nothing in particular or when your child throws their grubby little arms around your neck to give you a hug. You know...... life.
Now, if I could just get rid of that impending sense of dread, I'd be right. Maybe I just forgot to take my pills this morning.... yeah, I'm sure that's what it is.
Enjoy the ordinary ... now you don't hear that every day. But maybe we should.